First, I wanna say I just created this on my phone, so I'll make it all pretty later when I'm on a computer.
I have considered creating a blog for quite awhile. Actually, I made one and never used it. My main reason being fear. I don't fear sounding stupid, boring anyone to death, sharing myself with the world. I fear that if I say too much, if I begin to really open up, If I share my past, not only will I not be believed, but it will create an uproar amongst my family, and I will be the talk of the town where I spent my childhood. That when I go to visit, I will be ostracized and ridiculed. I fear that I will be judged, because nobody from my childhood really knows me. They know my mom, and a lot of them have opinions of her that aren't exactly favorable. So their opinion of me may be based on their opinions of her. I fear writing about my mom, because anything I say may get back to her, but anything I write wouldn't be to give her a bad name. I'm not out to hurt anyone... I'm out to heal myself.
My mom has issues, a whole lot of them (don't we all?), and they have impacted my life greatly, and I deserve to share them, without all of these fears.
She was not the only person who has greatly impacted my life, and I am so done with hiding. So I will let go of everything that has been holding me back, and for once, I will do something for me! I deserve it!
People will believe what they want to believe, and form the opinions they choose to form, and there's nothing I can do about that.
I have kept myself trapped for many years, and I will never be free, if I don't unlock the door.
